I want a piggy bank that comes to life and eats your hand

I don't think it's fair that banks and dairy companies can produce ads with cute walking piggy banks and hugging yoghurts without delivering the goods.
I held my arms outstretched at my fridge today waiting for the yoghurt to hug me - and did it??? NO!! Maybe the yoghurt was the wrong brand, maybe it was because the yoghurt wasn't mine and was off, but still - no hugging occurred between any dairy products and myself today.

I don't know what I would do with a random moving piggy bank, and yeah I have Sparticus - but I can't put money in her (without consequences) and she wasn't advertised blatantly as something I couldn't have.

Yes I am aware I'm a sucker for "cute" ads (DAMMIT) but the dairy and bank's ploy to lure me into their banks and foods hasn't worked - quite the opposite. I'll join their stupid bank for jerks (no offence any BNZ readers - just part of the rant) and eat their stupid foods for wanks when my food hugs me (and not the 'I threw up on myself now everything is sticky' hugging the toilet type of affection) and my money piggy banks get cute!!